The holiday season is associated with joy and celebration. It can also be an emotionally challenging time when we are managing grief. Whether you've lost a loved one, experienced a significant life change, or are dealing with any form of loss, the festivities can amplify feelings of sadness and isolation. Grief does't adhere to a calendar, and its intensity may surge during holidays when traditions and gatherings highlight the absence of a cherished presence.
7 Tips for Managing Grief During the Holidays
Robin Hyson
Here are 7 strategies to manage grief during the holidays:
1. Acknowledge Your Feelings
It's essential to recognize and accept your emotions. Allow yourself to feel sadness, anger, anxiety or any other emotions that arise. Suppressing them may intensify the pain.
2. Create New Traditions
Consider establishing new rituals or modifying existing ones. This can help you honor the memory of your loved one while adapting to the changes in your life.
3. Express Yourself
Share your thoughts and feelings with friends, family, your therapist or a support group. Talking about your grief can be cathartic and help you feel less isolated
4. Set Boundaries
Understand that it's okay to decline invitations or alter your participation in festivities. Take care of yourself and protect your energy. Prioritize your needs and communicate them to others.
5. Volunteer or Give Back
Channeling your grief into helping others can be a powerful way to find purpose and connection during the holiday season. Volunteering can be formal (like a soup kitchen) or informal (helping a neighbor or friend).
6. Plan Ahead
Anticipate potential triggers and plan how you'll handle them. Having a strategy in place can provide a sense of control in challenging situations. One way to do this is to think about any frustrating people or situations that might arise at an event you are attending and plan out how you will respond. Another might be to set a time limit for your attendance, and stick to it.
7. Self-Care Matters
Take care of your physical and emotional well-being. Get enough rest, engage in activities you enjoy. It can be something like going to see a movie or as simple as some intentional deep breathing before you start your day. Therapy is also a great source of self care.
As a Licensed Professional Counselor, I know this topic both personally and professionally. My mother passed away in 2020 and my father passed away in 2022. There are waves of grief woven throughout all my days, and especially during the holidays, as I long to have them with me. Grief pops up in the traditions that now feel different, when I feel sad that they are not here to witness the joy on my children’s faces, and in a collection of predictable and unpredictable moments.
Remember
Everyone experiences grief differently, and there's no right or wrong way to manage it. The holidays are part of the grieving journey. The holidays may be tough, but with time and support, you will find moments of peace and joy amidst the sorrow. Be patient with yourself and allow the healing process to unfold at its own pace. Be present with your grief and also be present with your life. Do things that serve your wellness and the meaning of your loved one, that still lives within you.