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  • Managing grief during the holidays

    The holiday season is associated with joy and celebration. It can also be an emotionally challenging time when we are managing grief. My mother passed away in 2020 and my father passed away in 2022, this is my 2nd holiday season without them. There are waves of grief woven throughout all of my days, and especially during the holidays as I long to have them here. Grief pops up in the traditions that now feel different, when I feel sad that they are not here to witness the joy on my children’s faces, and in a collection of predictable and unpredictable moments.

    Whether you’ve lost a loved one, experienced a significant life change, or are dealing with any form of loss, the festivities can amplify feelings of sadness and isolation. Grief doesn’t adhere to a calendar, and its intensity may surge during holidays when traditions and gatherings highlight the absence of a cherished presence.

    Here are a few strategies to manage grief during the holidays:

    Acknowledge Your Feelings

    It’s essential to recognize and accept your emotions. Allow yourself to feel sadness, anger, or any other emotions that arise. Suppressing them may intensify the pain.

    Create New Traditions

    Consider establishing new rituals or modifying existing ones. This can help you honor the memory of your loved one while adapting to the changes in your life.

    Express Yourself

    Share your thoughts and feelings with friends, family, or a support group. Talking about your grief can be cathartic and help you feel less isolated.

    Set Boundaries

    Understand that it’s okay to decline invitations or alter your participation in festivities. Prioritize your needs and communicate them to others.

    Volunteer or Give Back

    Channeling your grief into helping others can be a powerful way to find purpose and connection during the holiday season.

    Plan Ahead

    Anticipate potential triggers and plan how you’ll handle them. Having a strategy in place can provide a sense of control in challenging situations.

    Self-Care Matters

    Take care of your physical and emotional well-being. Get enough rest, engage in activities you enjoy, and don’t hesitate to seek professional help if needed.


    Everyone experiences grief differently, and there’s no right or wrong way to manage it. The holidays are part of the grieving journey. The holidays may be tough, but with time and support, you will find moments of peace and joy amidst the sorrow. Be patient with yourself and allow the healing process to unfold at its own pace. Be present with your grief and also be present with your life. Do things that serve your wellness and the meaning of your loved one, that still lives within you.